We’ve all met them. There are some people who take chat way too seriously – and some who don’t take it seriously enough. Maybe they’re guilty of using emojis more than words – or you’re not quite sure they ever learned how to use a keyboard properly.
Whatever the case, there's pretty much a guarantee you've run across one of these personalities over the years. How many can you spot in your office?
1. The Novelist
Ah, the Novelist. He is an ardent admirer of his thesaurus and all things verbose, and wouldn’t know brevity if it slapped him. He comes in many forms, and often uses words you don’t think even he knows the real meaning of.
Some Novelists are furtive, surreptitiously skulking in the background as they wait for the opportune moment to spring. They want to dazzle when the timing is right and won’t fritter that away on a whim.
If you’ve ever stopped mid-message to go Google a word – or he’s asked you to elucidate a comment – you may be speaking to a Novelist in denial.
2. The Telegraphist
Rome. Oh Romeo. Wherefore. Art thou. Romeo.
Everyone has run across at least one Telegraphist. Stereotype tends to paint them as the elderly, in particular the grandmother who messages you at strange times of the day with what seem to be more telegrams than IMs. No one knows if it’s poor eyesight, affinity for the period key, or questionable grammar in grade school that births the Telegraphist – but there’s no questioning that they’re here to stay.
3. Single-Word Brooder
I don't know.
Sometimes seen as a subset of the Telegraphist, they are masters of the one word answer, oftentimes in response to messages that were asking for an explanation. Most of this type are frustrating, either by accident or design. But there is the rare Single-Word Brooder who is awe-inspiring, leaving you to ponder just how they manage to always play it so cool.
4. Formal Emailer
More often than not, the Former Emailer is a junior or intern in the company who is terrified of reverting back to how they normally chat with friends. They take extra precaution to sound professional and can go so far as to include a greeting or sign off in each message. If you end chat messages with Sincerely, Susan or Thanks again, Jim, you may be a Formal Emailer. Better to break bad habits now.
5. Emoji Addict
Does this one really need an explanation? The emoji addict loves using pictures more than words, sometimes to the point where words simply aren’t necessary. A well-placed emoji is perfectly acceptable but when an entire message consists of smiley faces, lightning bolts, and flamenco dancers, there may be an issue. But that’s okay. Admitting you have a problem is the first step to recovery.
6. Chatspeak Queen
K but lyke whut if u tlk like this 2 ur friends? That’s fine. You may drive them up the wall a bit, but that’s fine. Bringing this into the workplace, however, not only doesn’t scream professional but may hurt your credibility. As far as office chats are concerned, leave the abbreviations and acronyms at home. And if you’re working from home, throw them out the window.
7. Silent Ninja
The silent ninja can be found in its natural habitat, the group chat. They will accept your invitation out of obligation and then lurk in the shadows, generally ignoring all notifications unless specifically aimed at them. When they contribute it is usually after everyone else in the group has forgotten they were in the chat, and days or even weeks can be seen between a sighting.
8. Overexcited Coworker
Last but not least is the very enthusiastic, easily overstimulated member of your chat. He will end all his sentences with not just one exclamation point, but three!!! And if he’s asking a question, by golly you’ll know just how puzzled he is because why use one question mark where four will do???? The Overexcited Coworker has a sense of urgency 100% of the time and will refuse to be ignored – even if it takes twelve exclamation points to do so.
Do you know a chat personality we missed? Have you pinned your whole office yet? Let us know which personality you'd vote out of the office if you had a choice!